It amazes me what the public school systems get away with. You hear about this no tolerance going on but I don't see it. I see kids getting in trouble for stupid shit like the color of their hair or the amount of earrings they wear. I don't see anyone's life ruined by sitting next to some kid in class that has blue hair. What I do see is the school system using the tragic occurrences from the past year to further their popularity and careers. The violence in the schools hasn't stopped from what I've seen. Okay, some of it has in the elementary schools. But what about the middle schools and high schools? The impression I'm getting is that as long as the kids don't have guns or bombs, there are no problems. It makes me fucking sick. Below is a true account of what has happened to my daughter this year in school. Keep in mind while you read this, that the school officials, I will not put their names down at this time, can't seem to remember anything when I ask why this has happened. I'm told one lie after another and most of the time they forget which child is my daughter and talk to me as if I am the parent of the problem child. It's hard dealing with morons, especially knowing they run our schools.
My daughter has been having problems with the same little girl picking on her all year. At first Jessica would just ignore her like I instructed. I called the principal over the 6th graders and she didn't seem to be interested. It kept going on and got worse. Jessica went to the principal herself and nothing happened. The other girl was stealing food out of the hands of Jessica and other kids during lunch. I called again; nothing was done to stop it. I called the main offices of the school district downtown to complain, I asked for a return call from the woman in charge of the middle schools. I got a return call from the person I was complaining about instead. Nothing happened. Then the other little girl started hitting my daughter and leaving bruises. I called. Nothing happened. I called again and requested a conference with both girls and both parents. The principal didn't feel it was necessary. I called the main office downtown. The same thing happened again. The wrong person called me back. Okay, I'm really pissed by now but trying to maintain control. Finally one day the girl hit my daughter again and called her a whore and said she was going to kill her. Jessica stood up on the bus and nailed her in the face and told her to fuck off. Now, my daughter admitted this to me. To be honest I would have done the same thing. Still, I called the school and they said Jessica was too aggressive. I started getting loud. The main principal of the school called me back and said that Jessica should just take it and then go tell. My daughter spent the first few months of school doing just that and got no results at all. I asked the principal what she would do if I came in her office every day and hit her. She said she would call the police. I asked her what she would do if the police never made me stop. She didn't have a reply. I asked her why the girl wasn't put in detention or suspended. I was told there were no reasons to take that kind of action. Then they tell me that both the girls signed a paper stating they would stay away from each other. The principal didn't even get their names right. There are no words to describe the anger inside me now. But still, I maintain control knowing I am dealing with incompetence.
All of the incidents above happened between August 1999 - December 1999. It is now January 2000 and the girl is back at it. This time I didn't even bother calling the school. I called the main office. Did I mention that I only get to talk to the secretary? The woman in charge is always out of the office or at a seminar. I made it clear I did not want the principal calling me back. If I wanted to speak with the principal, I wouldn't be calling her boss. Can you guess who called me back? The principal. She was actually yelling at me telling me I should have called her instead of going over her head. I told her it was a waste of my time because she had never done anything in the past so I didn't really expect any action now. I also asked her if it was a racial situation. Everyone is so scared of getting in trouble if a minority is accused of doing something wrong that often minorities do get away with it because they have learned that screaming racial injustice outloud gives them a free pass to do whatever they want. I asked her if maybe she wasn't jumping on my daughter because she is white and blaming her wouldn't bring up racial tensions. She didn't like that statement either. She informed me that her boss called her at home the night before to discuss the situation. I got yelled at and she told me that she instructed my daughter to just take the beatings and the verbal abuse and then go tell someone in the office. Same old shit again. I told her she was incompetent and crazy if she thinks we actually believe anything will happen. She told me that my daughter has now been labeled aggressive because of fighting back. I tell my kids to ignore teasing and stuff like that, and not to start a fight, but also not to stand there and not fight back if attacked. If someone attacks me, I'm not going to let them beat me up and then crawl to a phone to call the police. I'm going to fight back so I don't' get my ass kicked. According to school policy, the child should just take the beating and not lift a hand in defense.
Needless to say, I am still waiting on that phone call I requested. I was told from the beginning that it would be five days before I got it because the woman calling me back was unavailable. She made time to call the principal from home in the evening. Why can't she make time to call me?
In all fairness I would like to add that there are some great teachers that should not be put in the same group as the people they work for. I have spoken to quite a few and they all agree that the school system is not run the way it should be. They can't speak out or will be sent to another school, usually one a long distance away. My anger is aimed at the administrative staff that never returns calls, goes on seminars that have no location to be found and treats the parents as if thier concern about the safety of the children is ridiculous. I go to these schools and find out that the only ones there that are willing to do anything to help are usually secretaries and general office staff. The principals stand outside wearing long dresses and makeup that is way to dark, usually enough hairspray for the entire town or they look like something from a 50's sitcom, they just stand there greeting parents, shaking hands and smiling that fake smile all in the hopes of convincing parents that there children are in good hands. It really makes me angry that this principal can yell at me, I wasn't yelling at her. I tried going through the proper channels. I was very careful not to raise my voice except for once, and I even apologized for it because I am a nice person. What kind of example are they setting for the kids when they call parents yelling about getting them in trouble. Now all the kids think I'm the coolest mom because I made the principal lose control and turn red. I have to admit that I did get some satisfaction from pissing her off, I've been pissed all year and she didn't seem too worried about it.
Check back between January 24 - 28 for an update on whether or not I got my return call and if so, what was said.
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