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At the beginning of 1995 I began writing what I called
a 'night diary' - a Book of Dreams. I had been reading Dreams and
the Search for Meaning by Peter O'Connor, a noted Jungian, and
decided to take up the challenge of recording and analysing my dreams.
It was an interesting but difficult task, and I kept it up
for a while until just after mum died in 96. Not surprisingly, I dreamt
about mum often after her death. At first, whenever she appeared, I
would be shocked and surprised, and my response would usually cause
her to go away, or the dream to end. Then I tried what O'Conner
calls 'lucid dreaming', where the conscious part of the dreamer
tries to control or direct the dream, asking questions
of dream images. The results were somewhat mixed, but I found
if I didn't show shock or suprise when my mother
appeared, if I acted in the dream as though her appearance
was normal or expected, then she stayed around in the
dream longer. I was happy enough to be able to hold on to
her just that bit longer, and sometimes I was able to ask
her questions without her disappearing.
Besides the dreams I recorded from 95 to 96 I've included
some I managed to write down long before that, and some I've
written since then. Feel free to analyse these dreams of mine as much as
you like - God knows, I have! For the most part, I'm just
recounting them here as they were originally written after I woke, in
whatever style I saw fit to use. Sometimes a dream seems to have been sparked
by something in my conscious life, usually during the day or days before
it, and sometimes I mention this; but mostly I won't comment. Just
remember: dreams are strange, and many things in them will simply refuse
to make sense. But that's often the fun of them!
Warning: some crudities of language and incident follow...
Short Dreams
Mutation
Coming Out
Crash
Derelict
Sausages
Home-made Glider
Over-sized Shorts
Sanctuary
Procession
Physics Experiment
Rejected
My Old Identity
Patsy from Ab Fab
Escalator Letter
Rough Types and a Duck
Stained Glass Window
Jim Morrison
Katie
Home Dreams #1
Home Dreams #2
Mum and Dad
10: name.
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