Life Experience
by Livia
07/08/98
Important Disclaimer

Dear Diary,

Nothing happened at school today. Which was actually sort of a nice change. Just a couple of hours ago, though, I was in the library, working on this dumb homework essay, and it was almost dark when I noticed Giles opening the weapons cabinet. "Oo! Weapons!" I said, jumping up.

"Oh-- are you done with your essay already?" Giles asked semi- cluelessly.

"Well, no." I admitted. "But weapons training is a priority, right?"

"Well, there is supposed to be a rather severe thunderstorm tonight." Giles said. "The unseasonable weather should preclude much of the usual, um, vampire activity... I thought a better use of your time would be to learn the basics of fencing."

"Cool!" I walked over, and Giles handed me one of those face guard things, and we got down to the boring part. From the movies, you'd think swordplay would be fun... but anything can be hard work if you work at it hard enough. That's a deep thought, I think. After about an hour, I shared it with Giles, and he agreed.

"Yes, I think you've got quite a good um... grip on the basics." he coughed, falling into a chair. I hadn't noticed when it started, but it was raining really loud outside-- I guess that thunderstorm arrived. Sigh. I wasn't looking forward to the walk home. "Now, about that essay." Giles said.

Bite me! All of a sudden a brisk rainy walk didn't sound so bad. How could Giles still remember that dumb essay? I forgot all about it... Giles gave me this serious Look, so I pouted. "Giles! It's too hard!"

"Buffy, of all the students in this school," Giles said, "you are one of the very few who's had anything like what I'd consider a, a real life experience."

"Like you'd know?" I said snottily. Well? It's true. Before you have life experiences, you have to have a life. Giles just dialed up the Look a few notches and pointed it in my direction. "But that's the problem!" I sulked. "I can't put stuff about slay-related activities in my essay, and thanks to you, I don't do anything else!"

"Oh. Well. That's uh... true enough." he conceded. "W-well, what about before you were called?"

"You mean, like, previous to puberty? I was an unformed blob, Giles. I had a bad perm." The memory made me shiver.

He nodded like he understood what I was talking about. Yeah right. "W-well, yes, but surely there was some memorable experience in your life? Travel, perhaps?"

"Travel?" What a brilliant idea! "Yes! I've got a great idea now!" I said, and flipped open my notebook. "Giles, tell me about a trip you took some time."

"What?"

"You've gone places, right? So tell me about one, and I'll write it down and it'll be a great life experience!"

"Buffy, it's supposed to be yours." he said, pulling off his glasses and rubbing his nose.

"Well maybe I could have thought of one if you hadn't tired me all out with, like, training." I retorted. "And as long as El Nino is doing its thing outside, I'm stuck here, so..." I reached for his leather satchel thing, digging around inside. "There we go-- your passport!" I said, pulling out the tiny book and flipping it open. And, surprise me-- most of the little pages inside had stamps. "Wow. You really have travelled!"

"Buffy." Giles said sternly, putting his glasses back on.

"All right, all right. Just tell me a story about someplace you've been." I sighed, handing him the passport. "Maybe it'll remind me of one of these hypothetical life experiences I'm supposed to have..."

"Well, all right." He flipped through the pages, then stopped. Then he started laughing to himself.

I waited a minute, then raised my eyebrow. "Giles?"

He looked up, still chuckling. "Yes?"

"Well, normally you share the funny," I said, "and then we both laugh."

He stopped. "Well, it's really... it's really not that humorous." he said, and turned the page.

Like I was going to let him get away with that! I snatched the passport back. "Russia. What's so funny about Russia?"

"Well, n-nothing at the time." Giles said with a nervous grin. "It was um... a bit less than twenty years ago. I had just completed my Oxford degree." Suddenly he got that distant look in his eyes, like he gets sometimes when he's into a book. "Afterwards I was assigned to a museum in Russia's far north. The climate was er, quite inhospitable, and then a, a rather... unwelcome acquaintance of mine from London unexpectedly showed up to, uh..."

"What?" I asked, and Giles looks up at me all of a sudden like 'wait a minute, who am I *talking* to?'

"What??" I begged. "Giles!"

"To visit." Giles finished his sentence. "Things um... got a little out of hand when I was trying to rid myself of my uh, unexpected guest. Without my fellow Watchers finding out. And let's just say, uh... I hope never to have a hangover like that again." Giles sighed, looking over my head.

"Was that the funny part?"

"Well, uh, not exactly."

"Do I get to hear the funny part?"

"No."

"Why? What'd you do, wake up with a tattoo?" I smirked.

"Not that time." he muttered, and reached back over the table, snagging his passport.

So I'm sitting there trying to figure out if Giles made a joke-- hey, it would be a first-- and then he goes all stodgy on me-- "You can finish the essay tomorrow, the hour grows late, I'll drive you home" and like that. (I mean, "The hour grows late??" Who says that any more?)

Anyway I told him I'd walk. And it wasn't because I think his car is the rejectmobile, either. I'm not that shallow. It's just that it wasn't raining that hard, and hey, maybe it's weird, but it's mega disorienting to think of Giles being young! Like discovering Mom had Farrah hair... Hey!! Now that would be a great subject for my life experiences essay! Like, the generation gap, family history or whatever-- English teachers love that stuff.

So now, Diary, I gotta go ...except there's one more thing I have to get out of my head so I can forget about it as fast as possible and never think about it EVER again.

WHERE IS GILES' TATTOO???

Okay, good. Lingering curiousity, all gone. That'll never come up again-- at least, I sincerely HOPE not.

So anyway-- I'm homework girl! Bye for now!