Title: Pre-Holiday Cheer
Author/pseudonym: R. A. Swain
Fandom: Rudolph The Red Nosed Reindeer
Paring: Rudy/Herme, Yukon/Sam, Comet/Blitzen
Rating: R for language
Status: new
Archive: Yes, please. You have my permission to archive.
E-mail address for feedback: raswain@internettrash.com
Series/Sequel: It wasn't meant to, but it's becoming a series.
Disclaimers: The characters are not my property. They are used without permission,
and are used for the sole intent of entertainment and not for profit. Note other
disclaimers at beginning of story.
Notes: I just can't resist slashing these cute little characters. I'm a bad,
bad man, and deserve to be spanked, possibly by someone in an elf costume.
Summary: Rudolph and Comet have a confrontation, Sam and Yukon discuss future
plans.
Warnings: Slash is very addictive. No other warnings.
Disclaimer: The following story contains adult subject matter. If you are under
the age of 21 you should not be reading this and it is illegal for you to possess
it. If you read beyond this point, you are claiming to be 21 years of age, and
that it is legal for you to possess adult oriented material.
This is a sexually oriented work of fiction. If sex between consenting adults,
homosexuality or therein is offensive to you, DO NOT READ IT! By reading beyond
this point you are accepting homosexuality and adult oriented material willing.
Pre-Holiday Cheer
by R. A. Swain
The door to Rudolph's new office flew open and Comet burst in. "You had
to do it, didn't you, Nose-boy?"
"Do what?" Rudolph asked, shuffling papers with his hooves, and feigning
innocence.
"You know perfectly well, what I'm talking about," Comet said, his
nostrils flaring as he spoke. He stamped his hooves in anger. "You had
to go and show me up again."
"Oh, that," Rudolph said. He nodded his head vigorously. "Yeah,
I did, didn't I. And as usual you made it so easy."
"I'm gonna kick you cottontail up and down every glacier in the frozen
north," Comet threatened.
"Look, can I help it if I have great ideas the big guy loves?" Rudolph
asked, resting a hoof on his desk. "I just thought the world could use
something like this after all the terrible things that have happened."
"Oh sure, and we all know how much the world needs a concert right now,"
Comet hissed sarcastically.
"Not just a concert," Rudolph cooed. "Clausapalooza! The biggest
Christmas concert ever."
Comet snorted in anger. "And you just happen to be in charge of it."
"Well, you are guiding Santa's sleigh," Rudolph said, adding, "you
and Norad."
"Hey, the world is a dangerous place," Comet said. "We need military
backup."
"Funny, I never needed help getting Santa around the world."
Comet snickered. "So I've heard."
Rudolph's nose began to glow slightly pink.
"Oh, did I mention something to make you blush?" Comet asked, his
most innocent tone still not convincing.
"Fuck you, Comet!" Rudolph shouted. "Just fuck you!"
"Oooo. Nose-Boy is getting mad," Comet said, not even trying to hide
the glee in his voice. "The Red Wonder is pissed at my little joke."
"We'll see who's laughing at Clausapalooza, when the whole world will be
watching me play host to the biggest array of stars ever assembled," Rudolph
said. "That's right, the world will be watching me, with the occasional
check in on AntlerCam, to see how you're bungling the other world tour."
"Oh you are so going to get your scrawny ass kicked by me before Christmas,"
Comet said.
"Be careful," Rudolph said. "Santa isn't the only one to know
whose been naughty."
"And what's that supposed to mean?" Comet asked.
"Saks isn't the only store with surveillance cameras," Rudolph replied.
"The local feed and grain has them as well. It would be a shame if some
of their surveillance tapes made it to the enquirer, or CNN."
Comet was visibly shaken. "You wouldn't!"
"Oh Winona had nothing on you. Although the young guy working the register
seemed to have you over the counter, so to speak."
"That's it, elf munch! I'm gonna break that shiny red nose!" Comet
shouted, rearing up on his hind legs.
Rudolph dodged Comet's lunge. "Oh yeah, bring it on! This is the lead reindeer
of Santa's team. Can't even lunge in the traditional reindeer play."
"I'm warning you, Red. I'm serious here. You're stealing Christmas with
this concert, and stealing my chance at the spotlight."
"Oh come on," Rudolph pashaed Comet's comment. "Just because
I was able to get the remaining Beatles, the remaining Grateful Dead, and the
remaining Mamas and Papas, all together for a tribute segment, and I managed
to even get Michael Jackson to agree to make a taped appearance, and Carson
Daly is going to co-host with me, why would you think I was stealing your spotlight?"
"Look Red, this is supposed to be Santa's gig, and you've got three days
of concert going on, with every, and I mean EVERY, living musician on the planet
begging you for thirty seconds to showcase themselves," Comet huffed.
"But you and the team will open the show, and if you make it back in time
you'll close the show," Rudolph replied. "This is all about Santa.
It's called Clausapalooza for fuck's sake."
"Nice mouth," Herme said, walking in behind his horned lover.
Rudolph and Comet turned to face him. "You stay out of this," Comet
hissed. He turned to Rudolph. "This isn't over by a long shot," he
said, as he stormed out.
"Problems?" Herme asked.
"Nothing I can't handle," Rudolph answered.
Meanwhile, in Sam the Snowlawyer's office...
Yukon Cornelius poked his head in the cave. "Sam, are you busy?"
Sam shuffled across the cave to Yukon, and embraced him. "I'm never too
busy for you, stud muffin."
Yukon smiled and returned Sam's hug. "I've missed you so much."
"I'm very busy, what with Clausapalooza coming, and handling all the North
Pole legal arrangements," Sam said.
"Tell me about it," Yukon replied. "Being the head of security
for the largest gathering of talent in the northern hemisphere is no walk through
the ice fields either. But I just wish we could find some time for ourselves."
"I know," Sam said. "I sit here reading contracts and licensing
agreements, and demands from Diana Ross and Lily Tomlin, and all I can think
of is making slush with you."
"Oh man, I'm so horny thinking about romping naked in the Christmas Tree
Forest with you, licking your snowballs, nibbling your carrot," Yukon moaned.
"Let's do it! Right now, please?!"
"Whoa! Easy there, prospector boy. There is nothing I want more than your
salty pick probing me, but we've both got a load of work to get done. I'm not
taking any chances with this, after the big C's last warning," Sam said.
"I told you not to get involved with Mrs. Claus," Yukon said. "That
dame is trouble ever since she got mixed up with the Trump woman."
"It's a lot more than that," Sam said. "You know how Santa lies
to her and cheats on her with every lonely housewife, and several househusbands
as well. Hell, the whole world knows it, or at least the third he's doing on
any given weekend. The old boy's got a candy cane that won't quit."
"I've got one myself," Yukon said, nuzzling the Snowlawyer's neck.
Sam shooed him away, after rubbing back hard against his crotch. "You've
got a wet spot, now."
"I was getting one before," Yukon said.
"So is everything set for the security?" Sam asked, changing the subject.
"For now," Yukon replied. "I can't do much until the Abominable
Snow Monster gets back from his honeymoon."
"Who'd of thought he and that polar bear would hit it off so well?"
Sam mused.
"I'm just glad Santa was open to the civil union idea," Yukon said.
"Abe really found a good life partner in that bear. Not to mention such
a talented bread winner. Those soda pop commercials really paid big buck."
And meanwhile, on the ice fields near the stage area for Clausapalooza....
"Blitzen, have you got everything ready?" Comet asked.
Blitzen nodded. "You can count on me, boss."
"I do," Comet replied. He nuzzled his friend behind the ear. "After
this, the Red Menace won't be able to show his face to his Hollywood pals ever
again." Comet snickered, and then began to laugh loudly. "Yes, I am
the most evil reindeer of them all!"