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Midgets, Dwarves Funny
CAMBRIDGE, MA-- The annual “Humor and Humanity Study” by the Harvard University Humor Committee has rated midgets and dwarves as the funniest group of people for the 43rd year in a row, with an approval rating of 96%.  The study involved thousands of interviews of people across the country with the purpose of determining the most amusing categories of humans.
   “Midgets and dwarves topped the list because they appeal to an inherent desire of tall people,” said Dr. Nathaniel Neville III, the head of the committee.  “A desire to see midgets and dwarves dancing around in funny costumes.”
   Not surprisingly, midgets and dwarves nationwide are grateful for the attention.
   “I’m just happy I can provide so much laughter to the world,” said “Big” Joe Robson, a performing dwarf.  “People really care and wish us well.  For example, this diaper I’m wearing for my show was sent to me by Pampers, for free.  And Kushies sent me this rattle and pacifier.”
   Not all is pleasant in Munchkinland, though.  Some people are apparently disgusted by midgets and dwarves, going as far as calling them names like “little people.”
   “It hurts when they say things like ‘little people,’” said performing midget Hercules McHuge, wearing a bee outfit.  “I know I’m small, but at least with the word ‘dwarf’ it isn’t so annunciated.”
   The second funniest group as determined by the survey is “East Asians who can’t speak English too well,” with a 71% approval rating. 
   “The majority of Americans find speech impediments irresistible as sources of humor,” said Neville.  “Pronouncing R’s as L’s and vice versa has always been funny.”
   Third on the list is “African-Americans who make fun of whites,” with 63%.  Evidently white Americans enjoy being made fun of by African-Americans.
   “Year after year, blacks make the top three,” said Neville.  “I never get tired of hearing how I’m an uptight nerd who hates blacks.”
   The fourth and fifth funniest groups turned out to be “Indians with dots on their heads” (61%) and “homeless people” (56%).
 
 
Top 10 Funniest Things Midgets and Dwarves Do
Source: Harvard University Humor Committee, 2001
1. Wear children's clothing 6. Try to jump to get things held up high by tall people
2. Fight each other 7. Fight tall people
3. Dance 8. Dress like tall people
4. Impersonate tall celebrities 9. Stand
5. Play basketball 10. Climb onto chairs for tall people

 
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