Student Sneezes into Cupped Hands in Class
BOSTON—Glen Oak High School junior Michael Rosenthal sneezed into his cupped hands in history class Friday, leaving the wet-handed student in a stressful situation with no clear way out.
   “I'm coming down with a cold, I think, so I've been sniffing all day,” said the sixteen-year-old.  “Then I just let out this huge sneeze and caught it—all over my hands.”
   Rosenthal then proceeded to look at his still-cupped, glistening hands, as if searching for an answer.
   “Then he just sort of interlocked his fingers like nothing happened,” said fellow student Christine Fellows, who was sitting next to Rosenthal.  “Then I think he realized they were too wet to overlook.”
   Next, Rosenthal, noticing a glob of mucus dangling between his right ring and middle fingers, moved into action.
   “I leaned over like I had to get something from my backpack,” he said.  “Then I wiped it on the bag, while I wiped my nose on my shoulder.  Two birds with one stone.”
   “It was real fucking disgusting,” said Jennifer Burks, who was sitting behind Rosenthal.  “He was obviously leaking all over the place and didn't even have a Kleenex or anything.”
   Rosenthal defends his alleged lack of preparation.
   “I did have some toilet paper, but by the middle of the class it had all broken up.  I couldn't wipe my nose with that wet mass of shredded paper, and I certainly couldn't have caught my sneeze with it.  Am I so different from everyone else?  Do I not bleed red?”
   Rosenthal has vowed to bring adequate amounts of tissue to class in the future.