var quotes=new Array()

//change the quotes if desired. Add/ delete additional quotes as desired.

quotes[0]='Playing guitar is like fucking -- you never forget it........... Unless you\'re really, really stupid. <i>Frank Zappa</i>'

quotes[1]='The essence of Christianity is told us in the Garden of Eden history. The fruit that was forbidden was on the tree of knowledge. The subtext is, All the suffering you have is because you wanted to find out what was going on. You could be in the Garden of Eden if you had just keep your fucking mouth shut and hadn\'t asked any questions.'

quotes[2]='There is more stupidity than hydrogen, Therefore stupidity is the basic building block of the universe. '

quotes[3]='If there\'s ever an obscene noise to be made on an instrument, it\'s gonna come out of a guitar! '

quotes[4]='Art is making something out of nothing, then selling it'

quotes[5]='So long as somebody gets a laugh out of it,what the fuck?'

quotes[6]='Most people wouldn\'t know good music if it came up and bit them in the ass.'

quotes[7]='Nuclear explosions under the Nevada desert? What the fuck are we testing for? We already know the shit blows up.'

quotes[8]='On a sax you can play sleaze,  on a bass you can play balls,  but on a guitar you can be truly obscene!'

quotes[9]='A composer is a guy who goes around forcing his will upon unsuspecting air molecules, often with the assistance of unsuspecting musicians.'

quotes[10]='There is no such thing as a dirty word. Nor is there a word so powerful, that it\'s going to send the listener to the lake of fire upon hearing it.'

quotes[11]='There is no hell. There is only France.'

quotes[12]='When did mediocrity and banality become a good image for your children?'

quotes[13]='Let\'s be realistic about this, the guitar can be the single most blasphemous device on the earth! '

quotes[14]='Flatulence can be cruel! '

quotes[15]='Speed: It will turn you into your parents.'

quotes[16]='It\'s better to have something to remember than nothing to regret...'

quotes[17]='If we can\'t be free at least we can be cheap.'

quotes[18]='Nobody looks good bent over. Especially when picking up a cheque.'

quotes[19]='The guitar makes a stink noise. thats why I like it!!'

quotes[20]='If you want to get laid, go to college, but if you want an education, go to the library.'

quotes[21]='A lot of things wrong with society today are directly attributable to the fact that the people who make the laws are sexually maladjusted.'

quotes[22]='Anything played wrong twice in a row is the beginning of an arrangement.'

quotes[23]='Outdoors for me is walking from the car to the ticket desk at the airport.'

quotes[24]='The whole Universe is a large joke. Everything in the Universe are just subdivisions of this joke. So why take anything too serious.'


quotes[25]='Now imagine a Moebius vortex inside a spherical constant, and you\'ve got my cosmology.'

quotes[26]='I\'m not going to be Bill Clinton and say I never inhaled.  I did inhale.  I liked tobacco a lot better.'

quotes[27]='To me, cigarettes are food.'

quotes[28]='People who think of videos as an art form are probably the same who think of Cabbage patch dolls are a revolutionary form of soft Sculptor.'

quotes[29]='The crux of the biscuit is- If it entertains you, fine.  Enjoy it. If it doesn\'t, then blow it out your ass. I do it to amuse myself. If I like it, I release it. If somebody else likes it, that\'s a bonus.'

quotes[30]='You can\'t be a Real Country unless you have a BEER and an airline - it helps if you have some kind of a football team or some nuclear weapons, but at the very least you need a BEER.'

var whichquote=Math.floor(Math.random()*(quotes.length))
document.write(quotes[whichquote])